Nocturnal Emissions - (Keri)
What can I do to prevent Nocturnal Emissions (Keri)?
1) Always guard your eyes carefully during the day (see Tip #1).
2) Guard yourself from lustful thoughts.
3) The Kitzor Shulchan Aruch offers advice on preventing keri like reciting the first four Psalms before going to bed, and not overeating before retiring to sleep, and avoiding spicy foods..... The Arizal advises the concentrated recital of the Shema before going to bed as both a preventative measure and as a rectification of the souls that were taken captive by the waste of semen in the past. He also advises wearing a tallit katan while sleeping as further protection.
Taken from the Forum at www.jewishsexuality.com
I am a baal teshuva for the past 10 years, married to a good wife, with 2 kids.
I do suffer terribly from a horrible cycle that no one knows about. At nights , I wake up suddenlyly to see that I have had a Keri, a seminal emission, whilst asleep. Sometimes thereis an associated dream before hand (an immoral one), sometimes no dream.I awake in the quiet of the night , in dread, distress, I feel like I have died , and am cut away from HaSh-m. I usually clean myself.
Then , in the ensuing days , I go to the mikveh asap, say tehillim to help rectify the sin, try to increase in Torah study , especially the mystical dimension - kabbalah and chasidut, increase in mitzvot. Slowly slowly , things improve. I dont feel so dejected . I try make it through to a shabbas, to feel re-connected to HaSh-m.
Then BANG, it happens again. the cycle is usually between 2weekly to 1 monthly. It has been going for many years. It affects my marriage , even though I have never told my wife , out of embarassment, but she picks up on my times, of dejection, withdrawn, lack of energy and zest, that slowly improves.
I have tried every holy thing in the past to stop this dreaded sin, and cycle. Davening, learning Torah , increasing mitzvot, giving tzedaka, working with the community in Jewish activities, teshuva, and TRUE regret - but nothing stops it happening. I do not have lewd thoughts, genreally I think of torah most of the time, or otherwise worldly necessities , like work , are household things. My marital relations are done in accordance with the prescriptions of Torah, in terms of timing, lighting, position, atttitude and thoughts
Perhaps in my past , before teshuva, about 10 years ago, the heavy exposure to pornography and masterbation, has left its mark on my soul , that I just cannot erase. does anyone have any suggestions? Does anyone know , if I actually suffer Kares, spiritual excision, as a result of these night time seminal emmissions during my sleep? It is killing me, and takes my life away from me.
Our answer on the Forum
Wow! It's hard to believe that there is still such purity and sincerity in today's crazy world! There is definitely no punishment of karet for something that happens on it's own. How fortunate are you to do such sincere t'shuva for this, and not for the willful spilling of seed, which is such a prevalent sin today. How fortunate are you that your mind is filled mostly with Torah and not with lewd thoughts! How fortunate are you that your martial relations are done in purity! Rejoice my dear Jew, for you are from the few pure souls in this dark world!
Do not EVER let the Yetzer Hara make you sad or dejected because of this. This sadness is MUCH worse than the Keri itself. The Yetzer Hara is hoping to get you depressed and take you away from Hashem, from your wife and from yourself. We must always serve Hashem be'simcha. This is one of the most fundamental teachings of Chassidus.
The Lechevitcher (a student of R'Shlomo of Karlin) once went as far as to say, that even if a person just killed someone and the knife is still dripping with blood, but he feels can't stand and daven a Mincha with all his strength and with all his heart, then he has not yet tasted from the waters of Chassidus!
Tzvi Fishman answers on the Forum
First, since a nocturnal emission is something that occurs by itself, against a person's will, the person is not considered to have committed a willful transgression and there is no punishment of karet involved. In fact there are authoritive opinions that an emission of semen without an accompanying physical feeling does not cause impurity.
Nonetheless, t'shuva is certainly appropriate, especially if a person has had lustful thoughts during the day.
Since you are obviously engaged in heartfelt t'shuva over these mishaps, as you describe, you can feel assured that Hashem accepts your remorse and forgives you each time. So you should stop brow beating yourself, and reject your feelings of failure and depression. This is an old strategy of the yetzer hara to sabotage your service of G-d. Adopt an attitude of happiness instead. It could very well be that these mishaps are occurring to inspire you to do more and more t'shuva so that you can completely atone for all the sins of your past. So you should feel happy rather than sad that you have the opportunity to clean your slate completely. Try thinking that these occasions, and the feelings of t'shuva they cause, are getting you closer to G-d, not drawing you further away.
The holy Baal Shen Tov teaches that if a person has an emission without any cause or lustful thoughts, he should not worry because he was under a sentence of death for some other sin, and now, because of the great sorrow he feels in his heart over the wasting of semen, his broken heart takes the place of death, and he is absolved from the decree that was upon him.
The Kitzor Shulchan Aruch offers advice on preventing keri like reciting the first four Psalms before going to bed, and not overeating before retiring to sleep, and avoiding spicy foods..... The Arizal advises the concentrated recital of the Shema before going to bed as both a preventative measure and as a rectification of the souls that were taken captive by the waste of semen in the past. He also advises wearing a tallit katan while sleeping as further protection.
In addition to Tehillim and mikvah to attain purity and rectify the captive souls, the "Tikun Clalli" is recommended. You might also add the very powerful "Tikun HaYesod Yeshuat Eliahu," composed by Rabbi Leon Levi, and the "Tikun HaYesod" of the Ben Eish Chai.
If you live in Israel, a visit with Rabbi Leon Levi will surely help solve your problem and bring you to new heights of kedusha.
In summary, change your way of thinking, be happy, and look at these mishaps as a gift that G-d has been sending you to stir you to greater heights of t'shuva. Hazak v'Amatz!