Guard Your Eyes

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"Anti-Resentment" Exercise

By Elya K - moderator of the 12-Step Phone groups and Hot-Line

Here is a 4 Step exercise to help you make a "Cheshbon Hanefesh" and remove resentment and anger from your hearts. This exercise is the key to recovery for many people.

1) Write down 10 people, things, institutions, political parties, ideas, beliefs, values THAT YOU RESENT.

2) Next, for each one, write down what you believe is causing that resentment, for example:
    a. They did x, y, z to me,
    b. They talk too much,
    c. They're arrogant,
    d. They're obnoxious,
    e. They're SOBs,
    f. Etc...

3) Write down. This affects my:
    a. Ambition,
    b. Self esteem,
    c. Personal relationships,
    d. Emotional well being.
    e. etc...

4) THE KEY: Forget about everyone and everything involved, and write down what part YOU did to cause the situation or make it worse.  Were you:
    a. Selfish
    b. dishonest
    c. fearful
    d. inconsiderate

This exercise helps the anger and resentment you feel to go away.

Join our anonymous weekly 12-Step Phone Conference to learn the tools to recovery. We are starting now a new, FREE 12-Step conference, besides for the usual Tuesday night conference (which costs $10 a session to pay for the therapist on the line). Contact Elya K for more info.

We're also starting a phone conference specially for women, who are either married to addicts or suffer from addiction themselves. Details to come. Contact Elya if you're interested.