For six and a half years I have struggled, constantly recognising my tests (mostly surrendering to temptation) and often feeling depressed, low, and frustrated.

The many times I 'examined my ways', 'never stayed down (and got up again)' and thought I had made the change

So my attitude is at least what is motivating me to fight; the belief in Bitachon, Choice. And that is what it comes down to...free will, the power of decisions (and the consequences that come with it)

When you choose to 'see Hashem's Hand in Everything' you feel amazing; for that moment life is AMAZING

Think about it. Recall a memory when you were happy, and everything felt good, really good. It was only because at that time you were enjoying that moment

Life is for pleasure, for enjoying...but only if it feels right or good (A brilliant question to ask oneself is whether this action will make HASHEM happy) - This is what its all about: remove the ego and live for Hashem

Further, you should know that Teshuvah must be a happy, and enjoyable process; your growing and developing yourself!! Think positive thoughts, be calm, weigh up the consequences before you act

Really concentrate in Prayer (use a siddur), brachos, learning Torah...do not get distracted!! Devote your energies towards Hashem. At least then He will take you seriously.

And this is what it comes down to: Do YOU take Yourself seriously? Is Your life serious to you? Are you willing to accept responsibility (to do your best) to make other people happy, to help them?

It is never to late to change your thinking pattern of behavior, and decisions
Commit to making the best of your decisions and create your life the way that you want it to be

Live for your values, for what you believe in and for that which makes you - and Hashem - B'Simcha